The hands of time

I don’t know why Hondurans have clocks.

If there is one thing that frustrates me about Hondurans--and believe me, there are a few--, it would be their capabilities to tell time. I’m not talking people that are 10-15 minutes late for things. I mean these people are so perpetually late that I want to scream. Right now, I am sitting here wrapping presents for my new host mom (I’ll explain that in a minute) who is the Kindergarten teacher. Their graduation ceremony is today at 4:00 pm. Right now it’s 4:57 pm and we, the main event, haven’t even left the house yet. This is the story of my life. Waiting for people, waiting for meetings, and the perpetual lateness that is Honduras.

So new host fam. That’s right, number 5. It’s been a long, frustrating week. My host family had been talking about this feria (fair) in Estancias (a neighboring town, and by neighboring I mean like 2 hours away in a car). I’ve been excited about it and finally the day arrives for us to leave, which was last Saturday. My family was gone all day, but they called me and told me they had to talk to me. They stopped by the house on their way to Estancias and my host dad informed me that not only would they be staying in Estancias for a week, but 2 and probably even 3 weeks. Obviously this isn’t cool. I can’t be stuck in BFE for that long. He tells me he knows that and that even after 3 weeks, he is going to be andando (going, well, kinda) in the politics--my English is failing me miserably right now because that sounded terrible. I apologize. Anyways, basically he told me that I would have to find somewhere else to stay because I couldn’t stay in their house alone. He didn’t feel comfortable with that. I called Peace Corps and they were very upset with all of this. The family had signed a contract to keep me for 2 months. So I ended up telling PC that I really wanted to stay with my “aunt” who actually is my counterpart, which is technically not allowed. Who knows why.... but after 4 days I am all moved into my new house.

It’s nice here. I feel like I have a little more privacy. I have a bedroom that’s separate from the rest of the house and has its own private bathroom with an electroducha, ya know, hot water. It also has a nice big wardrobe, which is really nice to have a place to put my clothes, and also the bed is a full size. It’s nice to stretch out for the first time in months after sleeping on lots of twin beds. The best thing of all is that they have a washing machine. For the first time in four months, I washed my clothes in washing machine and it was incredible. It’s amazing the little things that I have found that can make me happy here. I forgot how dry clothes came out of the washing machine. It only takes an afternoon to dry on the line as opposed to the day and a half or more for jeans after hand-washing.

I also had another good adventure this week. My new family took me to Comayagua, which is a pretty big city about 3 and a half hours away from where we live. I got to go to a supermercado (similar to Wal-mart) and buy important things like olive oil, good cereal, sea salt, dog treats, pepper jack cheese, and Doritos. It was amazing. I also met another H15 volunteer there and we got to hang out and catch up, a much needed break from the Honduran reality. I have to say that I experienced a little bit of culture shock going to such a big city after being in the campo for a straight month. I felt antsy and a little overwhelmed. That was cured quickly though when my family took my friend and me to Pizza Hut. It’s sad to admit, but that was the most excited I’ve been in a while. I got to eat off the salad bar and order a supreme pizza and garlic cheese bread. Like I said, it’s amazing how the tiniest things seem to make my day here.

The food is a little better here in this house, so that’s nice. I had some good chicken today and it was delicious. Dog training is going well. Little Rambo already sits and shakes on command, and comes most of the time. He poops outside every time, now to work on the whole peeing thing, and also the word no. He’s not too fond of that one. I tried to buy a kennel in Comayagua, but they were 3,000 lempiras! That’s $150 for a dang kennel! I guess I will eventually have to buy one though....

I continue to be mostly bored here. I feel really lazy, but there’s literally nothing to do. I barely have work, and if I do, it’s for 2 hours one day a week. This is going to be a long summer (yes, summer is almost here, but summer only means the dry season, but igual, it means no school). Then comes coffee picking. I have tons of movies now though--81 on my computer plus an additional 30+ that I brought--and lots of books too (thanks to all who have sent me some :)). I’ve also downloaded some new tunes and that makes me feel a little more in touch with the real world.

Happy Halloween! I wish I could go to the big Peace Corps Halloween party in Copán, but I’m still a baby volunteer and no traveling for Yessica. Maybe the New Year’s party will be equally as fun. Nothing like escaping the developing world for a party with 150 gringos.

It’s 5:37 and we’re finally leaving the house for the 4:00 event. I’m going to go crazy here!

Here's a pic of me and the pup. :)

Chopped Liver

A few days ago, my host dad’s brother (who basically raised him because their parents died at an early age) was over at the house enjoying a cup of coffee, as many people do in the afternoons here. We were having a good conversation, despite his choppy, mumbled, campo Spanish. We talked about politics and development and the reality of Honduras. Apparently a Peace Corps volunteer had also lived with him years and years ago (I think he said 16 years ago). He told me about how they adored this volunteer and she had instilled in their daughter (who was 7 or 8 at the time) the desire to read, leading her to the path to truly value her education and seek a degree from the University here, which is far more than most people in this little community ever dream about. (They've only recently started a high school.) He said they loved everything about this volunteer except for one thing. She didn’t eat meat.

We talked about the meat situation in Honduras, and I told him, “Honestly, it is quite difficult for me to eat meat here too. We are spoiled in the US and everything we consume is of top quality, especially the meat. I am used to eating meat without bones.” He laughed and he made some jokes about how I just have to get use to chewing on the bones, sucking out the good stuff to get whatever protein could be found here. My host dad laughed too and threw in a few jokes of his own. Lately, he’s been throwing in some vulgar vocabulary for me to learn or he and my host mom will make a penis joke. I appreciate them. They make my reality here much more bearable.

Last night as we sat down to dinner, I was pretty hungry. I had only eaten rice, tortillas, and quejada (another weird variation of there different kinds of cheeses) for lunch. My host mom called me for dinner as she always does, and my plate was sitting on the table waiting for me. My host mom says--I think, remembering the conversation from 2 days before--, “See if you like this meat.” It looked like the best stuff I had been served thus far in my time in Honduras, and was even complete with some sauteed onions and peppers. This time there were no bones. Where had they gotten such quality stuff from? I took a bite. Two. Five. I consumed the 3-4 pieces of meat I had been served. The texture was a little new to me, but I didn’t think much about it. Again, the meat here is strange. After I had finished my meal, I ask my family, “So what kind of meat was that exactly?” They replied, “Hídago.”

Liver.

Then my dad chimes in, “And we cooked it in the microhondo!” In the microwave?

I’m laughing out loud right now as I write this and also as I dictated this same story to my mom over the phone a few hours ago. I ate liver last night for the first time in my life. If I would have known what it was before, I probably wouldn’t have eaten it. The best meat I’ve had in about 3 months and it’s liver. You’ve got to be kidding me.

I bought a puppy this past weekend. He’s probably too small to be away from his mom, but the treatment of animals here just isn’t the same. A month is sufficient time to take a dog away from it’s mom here. He looks like a black lab, but I was told he also has boxer in him too. The mom just looked like a black lab to me. I guess we’ll see as he gets older. He walks like a boxer sometimes. He’s just a little guy though, but he’s started sleeping a little more through the night. You forget the joys of having a new puppy like cleaning up after them. Oh, and we named him Rambo. Yeah, go ahead and laugh. I did at first too. One of the best soccer players on Honduras’ team is nicknamed Rambo. My four-year-old brother thought it was the best idea ever to name him Rambo. So, there you have it. At least it’s easy to pronounce in English and Spanish. I’m also having to train him in Spanish, since well, that’s the national language here. He would be lost if I spoke English to him, considering that since he’s the gringa’s dog, it kinda makes him everyone’s dog.

It’s absolutely freezing here. I haven’t left the house in 2 days. Until last night, I hadn’t showered in more than that. It has just been too cold to bear a cold shower. I don’t feel bad though, my family hasn’t showered either. I’ve spent most of the past two days reading in my sleeping bag. High forties without a heater and howling winds are brutal. I have on my underarmour winter gear under my sweats right now. I know, this is Honduras, right? That’s what I thought. Miserable cold. It’s gonna be a long winter.

I have heard lots of complaints from people who are trying to send me packages, telling me that it is costing them a fortune. Anything over 4 lbs will cost you. Keep the size down, and thus the cost. I really appreciate the packages for what it’s worth. Last night I finally received a bag that mom had sent with the owner of the orphanage who was home in AL a little over a month ago. Last night a friend who had been to Teguz (the capital) brought it to me. It felt like Christmas morning pulling out new shampoo, deodarant, facewash, a huge bag of M&M’s, and a few other familiar things that still smelled like home. It’s amazing how little it takes to make me happy these days.

Take a holiday in Spain (or Honduras)

First of all, I have a new address. It's on the sidebar. Send me mail. It doesn't have to be a package (but I sure do like those), just write me a letter or send a card. It would make me feel a little closer to reality. Tell me about new movies, music, relationships. I appreciate these things. Even though I have internet, it is painfully slow and the bandwidth isn't strong enough to upload or download, leaving me clueless about anything that's not on facebook. If I don't answer you on fb chat, means my bandwidth is dead. Letters are the way to go. [See side bar]

Time is a funny thing here. I’m sure you’ve always heard that Latinos never arrive anywhere on time. Well, Hondurans are no exception to the rule, in fact, they take that rule to heart in a way that is already driving me crazy. Be sure to ask if you’re meeting at the real time or Honduran time. We practice soccer at 4. Most people show up at about 4:40 and everyone is there by 5. Meetings are guaranteed to start at least 30 minutes later than they are scheduled for. Time also moves slow here. Sometimes my days seem so long that I think it’s never going to be time to get in the bed. How early is too early to excuse yourself to go to your room?

I remember when I studied abroad I hit this point where it had been the longest amount of time I had ever been away from home and out of the States. That came at about 3 weeks then. At that time, I experienced culture shock and an extreme desire to go home. This week I think I experienced that point. I have been gone from home for about 4 months now, the longest I have ever been out of the US. I wanted to be normal so badly this week. I wanted to eat meat that wouldn’t be rejected by the USDA, I wanted to be able to drive, go eat sushi, cook with wonderful spices and flavors, and have a good glass a wine (or just a glass period). I haven’t felt like I wanted to come home, but just that more of home was here. Hint, hint, mom, come visit me already.

I have been sick for over a week now. It started as a cold, but now I think that I have bronchitis. Our PCMO’s (Peace Corps Medical Officers) have been super busy this week, so they never called me back. I think I need antibiotics. The nearest pharmacy is like an hour or so away. Again, normalcy.... where are you?

My information I got about my site told me there were 800 people here. I think 200 is more of an accurate number. The other day I went by the mayor’s house to have coffee and platicar (to chat). After a good political discussion among other things, he introduced me to his oldest daughter who is also named Jessica. I continued talking with her and she was really floored at my desire to live here in this little pueblo for 2 years. “You really do like it here? Isn’t it hard and very different for you?” she asked me. She is one of very few of the people here who have had the opportunity to move to the city to go to the University. I hadn’t really been thinking about it much, but it is so different from the world from which I come. I don’t even know how to describe to you what it feels like to be this tall, white, blue-eyed, educated woman in this pueblo. Sometimes I feel so out of place, I don’t know what to do with myself. I’m a minority, and by quite the long shot. I’m sure that more than the mayor’s daughter wonders what in the world I am doing here. I too sometimes wonder what I’m doing, what I will do in these two years.

I do love my host family here. I am thankful that I can go back home to them, share with them, and joke around and feel a little normal. They treat me really well and are already considering me to be part of their family.

There is only one mirror in our house. (Not normal for a daughter of a hair dresser. There have always been mirrors everywhere in my life.) A few days ago, I straightened my hair (without a mirror) and got ready to go to the kindergarten. I went to look in the one mirror in the house, and I barely recognized myself. My hair has grown several inches (I hadn’t noticed because I usually wear it in a pony tail), is a very light reddish color, and I have pretty much stopped wearing makeup. It’s a strange feeling to look in the mirror after not seeing yourself for a while. I feel like I have changed...and not only physically. I think my personality is different in Spanish. Is that possible? I live my life here in my second language... Language barriers, somewhat limited vocabulary, and a place where sarcasm is rarely understood.

I’m definitely still messy in Spanish. My room is a wreck and I’m procrastinating washing the pile of laundry I have by hand. The sun’s out today, I should get to that.

In other news, the US tied against Costa Rica last night with about 12 seconds left in the game. What does that mean? Well, it means that CR gets bumped to 4th place, and moves Honduras to 3rd place, qualifying them for the World Cup next year in South Africa. Oh and the US won 1st place. Everyone went ballistic here when US scored the goal. I think more people here were watching that game instead of the Honduras-El Salvador game. There are 3 cars in my community. We all piled up in the back of the 3 cars and went around honking the horn, whistling, and screaming HONDURAS HONDURAS! This is the first time in 28 years that Honduras has gone to the World Cup and only the 2nd time ever. Soccer is life here in case you didn’t know that. So it’s a big deal. A huge deal. Today was declared a national holiday. No school. No work.

No wonder they can’t escape this cycle of poverty. Always taking holidays.... Guess I’ll just read another book today.

If anyone should not celebrate Columbus Day, it would be the people of Latin America.

That's all.

Okay, Obama, you just won the Nobel Peace Prize. Can you please do something about this whole Honduras situation? We’d all like some paz (peace) around here.

The de facto Honduran government announced last night that schools will be getting out on October 31 because of elections. The students here have lost months of school because of this situation and now they’re ending school early. Not only that, they also announced that no student would be held back this year. Every single student will be passed, regardless of what their grades are. This is so sad for the kids here. They will start out next year behind and probably will be left to fend for themselves.

Other than that news, things are going really well here. My new site is beautiful. It’s cold, but beautiful. Don’t laugh at me. It really is pretty chilly here, especially at night. I am sick and I think it’s because of the weather change. Sometimes in the evening, I go into the room where our fogon (wood burning stove where we cook important things like beans and tortillas on) is to sit by the fire and warm up. I wear sweats and warm socks at night. It’s been pretty nice during the day, but it usually rains and gets cold starting about 3 or 4 pm. I have met lots of people in my community and they have been more open and friendly than I was thinking they would be towards this strange gringa. Literally.

Today the US and Honduras are playing soccer. If Honduras looses, they're out. So it kinda sucks to be in the position to not know who to cheer for. I am just hoping for an impate (a tie). The game is at 7 central time if you're interested in watching.

I have joined a women's soccer team here. We have our first game tomorrow. I am really excited about it. All the girls are about my age, maybe a little younger. We have a few good players, but I just hope we don't get killed tomorrow. We'll see. I think that these girls are going to become some of my really good friends.

I am also working with a youth group from the Catholic church here. I have hung out with them twice and they want to learn to play guitar and sing new songs, so I'm of course very excited about that. I'll do whatever they want in terms of music. I do wish I had my guitar here though. Maybe I'll try and find one here. I sat through a service with them as they prayed the rosary. I think that I almost know the whole Lord's Prayer in Spanish now.... the rosary.... well, it's kinda different. I don't know what to think. I guess I will learn and participate to be respectful of their religion here. It will be a learning experience. Religion is a whole different animal here.

Today I went to the vet in the nearest city to ask about finding a puppy for me. He's gonna find one for me in the next month or so. Who knows what kind it will be. It will be an adventure to train a dog in Spanish. I think that it will keep me occupied and keep me from being so bored when school gets out in a few weeks.

I'm a little sick today. I have a cold. Boo.... but I am in the big city right now and I am sitting on a sofa in a real coffee shop. It's nice to feel normal for a few hours and have a cappuccino, a diet coke, and a pack of Skittles for the road. It's funny how you learn to appreciate the little things.

two years starts today.

On March 6, I received my invitation to serve in Peace Corps Honduras. Since that day, I have been waiting for and imagining the community where I would work and live, the community that would become my home. After a golpe de estado (or military coup), an unexpected trip to the Dominican Republic, a week in Miami, President Mel sneaking back in the country, toque de quedas, and 4 family home stays, I have reached my final resting place here in Honduras.

This last week has been a crazy, but fun one. We had lots of goodbye parties, we met our counterparts, and were sworn in at the US Embassy as official Peace Corps Volunteers. It has been quite emotional as well. If Peace Corps has its downfalls (and sometimes it does), one is this: you spend your first 3 months of your PC career getting close and getting to know the other trainees in your class (ours is H15). You spend just about every waking moment with these people, and because we are all in this strange, new country and culture together, we formed bonds quickly. Then in an instant, you say goodbye, give hugs and walk away to be alone in your new site. It's like they just play with your emotions... here are your friends. Love them. Get to know them. Soon they'll be 10 hours away from you and you'll see them twice a year. I don't know if there is another way to emulate actual service, but it is still a terrible thing to go through. The goodbyes suck. (Sorry Nannie, if you don't like that word.)

Back to my original thought....So more than 6 months in the making I have imagined this new community..... I don't remember exactly what my original mental picture of this place was, but I am here now and it's more than just a thought. This is my new reality. I honestly didn't think that I was going to be in a community this small, but yet, this is what one might think of when they think Peace Corps. It was about a 4 hour bus ride from the capital to my nearest big city, which isn't that bad. Then from there, I had lunch at my counterpart's house (she lives in that big city), went by the post office to get a PO Box, then threw all my maletas (luggage) in the back of a pick-up to head up the mountain to my site. This is where the pavement ends.

Remember Rockford? Pretty much the same thing. Miles and miles on red, dirt roads, only this time into the mountains. There is coffee everywhere here. Beautiful green leaves with yummy coffee that will be ready to cut in a few months. After about an hour and a half on these dirt roads, we topped a hill and my counterpart pointed out my new community on the hill. We arrived and I met my new family where I will stay for the next two months while I learn about and meet the community and look for a house to rent. They're a pretty young couple with kids that are 5 and 4 months, both boys. The dad is running for mayor right now and his brother-in-law is the mayor. My family makes up almost half of the town. The house is relatively large and it's nice. The best thing is the view out my window. I am on top of a mountain and can see everything below. There are also mountains in the distance, one of which is actually a volcano over in El Salvador. Yes, I am that close to the border. It's beautiful. I had to just sit out on the grass and take it all in. Oh did I mention it's cold here? Yes, that's right. Cold. 6,000 meters high cold and it's not even the coldest part of the year yet. I will be spending my time here wearing hats and jackets and sleeping in my 20 degree sleeping bag. (One of the best decisions I ever made was buying that thing.)

My community had a welcome party for me minutes after I arrived. I was exhausted, but I smiled and drank coffee and watched the kindergarten children do danzas folkloricos. It was precious, and I was quite overwhelmed. I also had to give a speech. Yuck. I haven't been speaking much Spanish lately. Time for a change. All Spanish now.

I am extremely tall here. The people here are an indigenous group called Lenca. They're tiny. Doorways are mostly too short for me and I'm only 5'7'' on a good day. Most of them are about 4'10''-5'2'', maybe even smaller. I could get used to this. I am realizing right now how developed Talanga and Valle were. This place is worlds apart from Tegucigalpa. My coffee this morning had cow's milk in it. Straight from the vaca. And the tortillas here are made straight from the corn they grow. Pick it, shuck it, take out the kernels, grind it, and it's a tortilla. Some of these people have never seen a computer and cable i a big deal. The baby calves are asleep out on the front porch. Out of all my travels throughout Central and South America, this is by far the most rural and undeveloped place I've ever been, but it is beautiful. It is however, going to take a minute to adjust yet again. Little by little.

I can't wait for some of you to come and visit me and see this. Describing it to you on here doesn't do it justice. Just get your passports and come see me. You've got two years starting now.


If you want to see some pictures from swearing in and such:
here they are.




Just a side note.... It's been 6 years today. Six years since Cody passed away. Unbelievable. Even though I am so far away from all of you, know that my thoughts are with you and that I am too thinking of Cody bear.

All dogs go to heaven

Or at least I hope so.

My dog Maya got run over last week and was killed.

She was my baby and I am terribly devastated. People here in Honduras don't understand how it feels to loose an animal like this. They treat their dogs like trash and they don't comprehend why I am upset.

This is going to be a tough week. Good thing it's the last one. Or maybe bad thing.... Starting Saturday, I will be alone in my site.

I know that many of you are busy and have your own lives and lots of things going on, but the next couple of months are going to be tough. I need your love and support. Please find time to email me or write me a letter. It would really mean a lot to me. It's tough to be here sometimes and sometimes even if it's just a quick hello or a message on facebook, it really means a lot. Thanks to those of you who have done so. I really appreciate you.